On my return trip from Lviv I was sharing the train cabin with a Ukrainian soldier and we spent close to 5 hours talking nonstop.
He shared with me that he enlisted as a volunteer a few days after the beginning of the full-scale invasion and has been following the service-hospital-service route ever since. He had no prior military experience, in fact, he was a successful chef traveling around some countries in Europe and also around Russia’s Asian neighbors. After enlisting, he first served in the infantry and then, after numerous injuries and becoming partially unfit for service, switched to the air force, and became a sergeant, responsible for a team of about 10 soldiers. He shared that as a sergeant, he hardly sleeps because there is so much work to be done behind the scenes to gather intel and take care of his team. He had a really positive attitude about it, sharing that he’s used to it by now and that he will take care of his health when the war is over, because now every day can be his last. In his opinion, nothing but injuries or deaths of his team would bother him.
He shared that the war has made him a softer man, according to his wife, and he notices it too. If before, during an argument or someone’s outburst, there might have been an aggressive response from him, right now he is more likely to tightly hug a complaining person and say “my brother… it doesn’t matter… you’re alive, look around you, you’re alive, safe, what’s there to complain about.” Of course, conversations like this more often happen with civilians, who are more likely to get upset over small non-life-threatening things, like a 15 people line in a grocery store. For someone, whose life has been in danger so many times he’s surprised to be alive, there aren’t many civilian life problems he would consider worthwhile stressing over. But I love that he was being kind about it. “My brother… it doesn’t matter…” is different from “if you want something to cry about go enlist and we’ll show you real life and death situations.”
The conversation with him was very helpful for me personally as well. Along the same lines of stressing over minute issues, his attitude of “if you wake up… if you still have your arms and legs… everything is well” was quite contagious and inspiring. I tend to stress over… everything. This is the everyday life of an anxious and depressed person. But this conversation was more helpful than therapy and seemed to have helped put my head on straight. My family is safe, my loved person is with me, I am able to fund myself and even make some donations. I am healthy and young. There isn’t anything I set my mind to that I can’t achieve. And I want to do more with my body and mind to become a stronger person. Never as strong as a soldier, but at least not a whimp that I have been.
When I expressed thanks for his service, his response was that no thanks were needed, he couldn’t have imagined himself anywhere else since the war started. Even his wife eventually said that she understands his decision and would’ve gone if she were male. He fights for his family, a child born after the beginning of the full-scale invasion. He fights for other children, for the elderly, and for the young people to have a life. His faith is strong in continuing the fight, for as long as necessary – he believes the war is barely half over timewise. He wants his son to be proud of him down the road, when he asks dad what he did during the first years of the war.
The military man expressed that “we’ll figure it out” even without the additional supplies of weapons and without forcefully mobilized soldiers – “we can’t fully trust or depend on someone who didn’t want to be here.” He shared stories about some of the military men he knew, who have been injured and considered partially or fully unfit for service because of injuries, but paid bribes to be allowed back on the battlefield with old buddies. Another story was of a soldier who got injured and was sent to the hospital. A little while later the hospital called to say that the soldier ran and is now considered to be a fugitive – and his comrades informed the hospital that actually the soldier is already back in the trenches with them. These are the soldiers who are committed to victory and will not give up, even when they do deserve the time to rest and recover.
This conversation was truly uplifting for me in these times of uncertainty, caused by current diplomacy issues between Ukraine and the U.S. The Ukrainian spirit is strong and unyielding.
I also spent some time at the Lviv cemetery with daily burials and I am scared for the soldiers. They aren’t robots. They have fought for a long time, and some even longer – since the initial occupation of Ukrainian territories in 2014. Death, injury, and destruction are ongoing factors of the war. Ukrainians are tired, but are willing to fight with shovels and rocks if needed, willing to fight despite waning American support. But they shouldn’t have to be alone in this. This isn’t technically WW3, because the soldiers are mostly of the 2 nations. But the war and issues of democracy and diplomatic failures impact the whole world and Ukrainians deserve international financial, military, humanitarian, and moral support on the ongoing basis, just as the war is ongoing.
